On a breezy warm spring morning, three American white pelicans—Carl, Bev, and Frank—bobbed along the glassy surface of Evergreen Lake in McLean County, Illinois. They had stopped for a layover during their annual migration, and as usual, boredom was setting in.
"I’m telling you," Carl said, flapping a wing dramatically, "I caught a fish this big yesterday."
"That wasn’t a fish," Bev scoffed. "It was a soggy flip-flop. And you nearly choked on it."
Frank, the self-appointed philosopher of the group, dipped his bill into the water and sighed. "Isn’t it curious," he mused, "how humans throw their shoes into lakes? What if those flip-flops are part of a secret migration ritual?"
Bev rolled her eyes. "You’d think less if you fished more."
Carl, not one to be outdone, straightened his neck. "Alright, enough chit-chat. Let’s settle this with a good old-fashioned Paddle-Off. First one across the lake wins bragging rights—and the best fishing spot."
And so, the Great Pelican Paddle-Off began.
Carl surged ahead with reckless enthusiasm, sending water everywhere and startling a family of turtles. Bev, focused and calculating, glided smoothly, drafting behind Carl to conserve energy. Frank? He took a more leisurely approach, pondering the meaning of water ripples and occasionally stopping to admire his own reflection.
Halfway across, Carl burned out, wings aching. "I’m not saying I peaked early, but—" he huffed, as Bev shot past him with a gleeful squawk.
Just as Bev neared the finish, Frank floated by without breaking a sweat—or a feather. "You know," he said dreamily, "sometimes the fastest way across is to let the wind do the work."
He drifted gracefully over the finish line, winning the Paddle-Off through sheer philosophical detachment.
Carl and Bev caught up, glaring at their unflappable friend.
"Well, Frank," Bev said grudgingly, "I guess you earned the best fishing spot."
Frank smiled. "Oh, you two go ahead. I’m just here for the vibes—and the occasional soggy flip-flop."
And with that, the three pelicans paddled off into the sunset, their rivalry settled—for now.